Meet Tamarin, with a Masters in Clinical Psychology, Tamarin is a trained Pyschotherapist. She has merged the Clinical with the Spiritual/Holistic Healing sphere, and founded her own practice EmpowHER Healing, working with women all over the world.  EmpowHER Healing was born from the need to merge the Clinical with the Spiritual. It is the fusion of Tamarin's extensive Psychotherapy training experience and background, with her spiritual guidance, intuitive and energetic healing passion. Through her practice she has provided a space for women to explore their fears during pregnancy of motherhood, birth and beyond, and has helped women adjust to their new roles of motherhood.

At our practitioner support circle, recently hosted within our Paddington Community Kitchen in celebration of the launch of our Orchard Street smoothie collaboration, we connected with Tamarin to talk to her about what and how she believes we can best nurture mothers in the fourth trimester.

How can new mothers best support themselves through such a life changing event?   

By doing the inner work before conceiving. By conceiving consciously, and by continuing to do the inner work during pregnancy; exploring, identifying and releasing their triggers, inner child wounds and past trauma/wounds to create space for this new being to enter their womb, and to also embody a newness and the new role of motherhood themselves. Surrounding themselves with like minded souls is also a game changer during pregnancy, as well as postpartum, as it’s natural oxytocin for the soul. Mothering themselves during the entire process, and learning how to effectively nurture and mother ourselves before becoming a Mother to a child is imperative. 

How can we as a wider community better support new parents through this transition?   

By supporting her decisions. Trusting her, and knowing that she does know best. Giving her space to not be her best self (hormones are wild and can be highly challenging and rough at times!) 

How can we as a wider community better support new parents through this transition?  

More education and information about holistic practices, more support postpartum and before birth (pregnancy circles etc). 

How can a new mother maintain her sense of self as she makes the enormous shift into parenthood?  

She doesn’t really! It’s by leaning into acceptance that she is a NEW version of herself, and grieving the old version. Allowing herself to grieve is healing. It’s connection to self that is needed, not maintenance of a sense of self, as that has shifted entirely. Connecting to one’s sense of self is anything that can bring the new mother joy. Surrounding herself with support, friends, family or like-minded souls. Perhaps committing to one small glimmer a day that sparks joy, such as a small nature walk, a 5 minute meditation practice (instead of her usual 20 minutes twice a day). Adapting to a new normal.

What was the most challenging thing you experienced as a new mother?

The lack of boundaries, and an abundance of expectations, and projection from others based on their fears/negative experiences, or experiences in general. Navigating a new identity/sense of self. Balancing the grief with the deep gratitude, and learning not to shame or judge myself for the feelings of grief. (happy to expand on this in person)

How can new parents better navigate the changes in relationship dynamics with the addition of a new baby?

First, it’s important to expect and accept that dynamics WILL always change. Maybe not drastically, but it is all relative. It’s about realizing that this addition of a new baby can be all-consuming. It also triggers you in various ways, and can potentially bring out your shadow, egoic self. It can amplify the previous unresolved conflict you and your partner had, as well as unresolved issues between you and family members, activating your own inner child wounds. It is important to recognize and reflect on the fact that the change in dynamics doesn’t necessarily equate to things being negative. A new baby also strengthens the foundation of your intimate relationship and brings you a lot closer in many ways to your partner and/or family. It also reconnects you often to friends you may have journeyed away from years ago.

Specifically in regard to the changing dynamics within your partnership: It is best to try to create space for where the other person is coming from, and cultivate compassion, understanding and empathy that your partner is adjusting to their role in parenthood too, so their stuff may be surfacing. When we cultivate compassion and understanding, we become less frustrated, less triggered, less angry.

Discover more about Jess, here here 

Learn more about our community kitchen and Paddington store here  | Learn more about the Nature Baby x Orchard St collaboration here